My daughter turns three in just over a week and we are making arrangements for her to start preschool. It occurred to me that this is the last time I’m going to do this. She’s the last of our three kids to start nursery and never again will we go through all the emotions that go with it.
It made me think of all the other “lasts” that have been and gone. We spend so much time focusing on all the firsts, that the lasts go almost unnoticed. In our rush to hit the next milestone we don’t stop to realise we’re never going to have these moments again.
Never again am I going to be the mother of a newborn. Never again will I wean a baby. And now never again will I have a two year old.
I have been guilty of looking forward to Anna being a bit older and hopefully (fingers crossed!) slightly less demanding. I now wish I’d spent more time enjoying the present.
There were so many lasts that went unnoticed. Those moments I didn’t realise would never happen again.
The last time she needed rocking to sleep. At the time I was praying that night would be the one she finally settled on her own. Obviously that night did come and now I can’t help thinking how much I would love to cuddle her to sleep now, but being the independent diva she is, she won’t let me!
There was the last time she fell asleep on my shoulder so I could inhale that sweet new baby smell. I’ll never again hold a child of my own like that, my cheek resting on top of their fluffy little head.
I remember how she would cruise around the lounge holding onto the furniture. Before I knew it she was toddling up and down the stairs and careering round at break neck speed.
The last time she used the word “coo” instead of cuddle. The last time she wore a baby grow or the last time she drank from a beaker.
The list is endless.
I wish I’d cherished those moments, held her a little tighter, cuddled her a little longer. Enjoyed that feeling of being completely needed.
It’s made me realise we need to slow down. We need to stop being in such a rush to watch our children hit the next milestone and just enjoy these moments.